Since my last post I have heard from many mothers who have lost children.  As I read their stories I feel honored that they would share their heart with me.  I was so touched by their stories. Although their hearts are broken, they somehow have found peace and gratitude for the lessons their children have taught them.  They have the ability to share their love and offer encouragement to me. These children who have passed have taught us so much. They teach us to cherish the ordinary moments in life. Standing at the sink washing dishes with my other children no longer feels like a chore; it feels like intimacy and love. It has taught me that the jumble of shoes kicked off at the front door is a sign of life.  It’s taught me that sharing a meal is communion. It has shown me that the small stuff really doesn’t matter. About three months after my son passed away, I was still in...

April 1st will mark six months since my son passed away.  As I approach this date it is hard to imagine it has been half of a year.  I have a lot of emotions about this. One thing I know for sure is that I am forever changed. The loss of my son has changed me in profound ways.  As I move through the shock and try to make sense of what has happened, I realize I am never going to be the same.  As I move through the process of trying to accept this loss I realize that I have a new relationship with God. It is almost as if my son has made a formal introduction,  “Mom,  this is  God. God, this is my mom.” I was already acquainted with Him.  But this is a new type of relationship.  I feel as if I have have had a peek behind the curtain. The experience of losing a child has been a stripping away of everything that I thought life was about.  Life was something that happened in the...

If you had asked me when I was 9 years old what I wanted to be when I grew up, baton twirler would have been my top choice.  It was the only thing I knew how to do well at that time.  As I have become more mature, I realize that the question shouldn’t be, “What do you want to be when you grow up?”.  The questions should be “What is it that makes you, You?  How are you going to let your light shine?  What are your gifts and talents? How are you going to shine a light on Christ?” In Matthew 5:13-16,  Jesus tells us, “You are the salt of the earth, but if salt has lost its taste, how shall its saltiness be restored?  It is no longer good for anything but to be thrown out and trampled under people’s feet. ” He also says, “You are the light of the world. A city set on a hill cannot be hidden.  Nor do people light a lamp and hide it under...